Beware of staff in Norman library

With my local library still reeling from the arrest of an employee suspected of sexual perversion, remaining library employees are getting on-the-job training on how to deal with other sexual deviants.

A man was arrested on Monday after allegedly grabbing library workers and exposing himself in Norman.

“He charged the staff who were trying to form a barrier between him and the customers, and he charged back into our circulation department, shoving aside staff and customers,” said branch manager Susan Gregory.

I think the word “staff” is mentioned a little too often in this story. That word in my head, and an image of an exposed, wild man charging people sounds extra offensive. Which may explain this:

“He was just kind of grabbing us and things, so we were trying to stay out of the way,” said employee Shelby Jones.

This incident probably won’t be the last. In fact, I foresaw this very type of thing happening.

With all the hot librarians at the Norman Library …

And considering this guy sounds like a red-blooded heterosexual …

Police said he threw a woman against a desk; grabbed a woman by the breast and dragged her across the floor; grabbed and shook a woman; pushed a man around; and grabbed another woman by the breast and swung her around. Dedrick “yelled at staff” and “exposed his penis,”

Ya know, gay-themed children’s books don’t sound quite as threatening anymore. In any case, I still think it wouldn’t hurt to hire only ugly librarians in the future. Rep. Kern, are you listening?

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2 Responses to Beware of staff in Norman library

  1. Adri says:

    – 😀

  2. Redneck Diva says:

    If he was able to grab a woman by the breast and swing her around….well, I think she needs a better support bra.

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